How This Sick Day Advice Went Hilariously Wrong…

Chinese man rings his boss and says,
“Me no work, I sick.”

Boss says,
“When I’m sick, I sleep with my wife, try that!”

2 hours later, Chinese man rings back,
“Me better, you got nice house.”

The Sick Call

Early one Monday morning, Zhang Wei, a diligent employee at a bustling import-export company, woke up feeling under the weather. His head throbbed, and his throat felt like sandpaper. It wasn’t like Zhang Wei to miss work—his boss, Mr. Thompson, often praised his dedication. But today, even Zhang Wei couldn’t muster the energy to make it to the office.

Reluctantly, he reached for his phone and dialed Mr. Thompson.

“Hello, Mr. Thompson,” Zhang Wei croaked. “Me no work today. I sick.”

On the other end, Mr. Thompson, a no-nonsense manager with a knack for dispensing unsolicited advice, wasn’t about to let his best employee off the hook so easily. He chuckled warmly. “Zhang Wei, when I feel sick, I don’t just lie around. You know what I do?”

Zhang Wei furrowed his brow. “What?”

“I sleep with my wife,” Mr. Thompson declared, as if revealing a groundbreaking remedy. “It works wonders! Try it. You’ll feel better in no time.”

Zhang Wei was taken aback. The advice was… unconventional, to say the least. But he respected Mr. Thompson and figured he had nothing to lose. He mumbled a hesitant “Okay, I try,” and hung up the phone.

Two hours later, Mr. Thompson was immersed in his usual sea of paperwork when his phone buzzed. He glanced at the caller ID and saw Zhang Wei’s name flashing. Smiling, he answered, expecting to hear that his employee had decided to come in after all.

“Zhang Wei! Feeling better already?” Mr. Thompson asked cheerfully.

“Yes, yes, much better!” Zhang Wei replied, his voice brimming with enthusiasm. “You right, boss! It really work!”

Mr. Thompson laughed, pleased that his advice had seemingly done the trick. “Glad to hear it! So, are you coming to work now?”

“No, no,” Zhang Wei said, his tone turning sheepish. “Not come work. But I call to say… you have very nice house!”

There was a moment of stunned silence as Mr. Thompson processed the comment. Then it hit him like a ton of bricks. His jaw dropped, and his pen clattered onto the desk.

“Wait a minute, Zhang Wei,” he stammered, “what do you mean, ‘nice house’?”

“I do what you say!” Zhang Wei explained earnestly. “I feel sick, so I go your house, sleep with your wife. Now I feel much better. She make good soup too!”

By now, Mr. Thompson was in full panic mode. He bolted upright, knocking over his chair. “Zhang Wei!” he spluttered. “You didn’t actually—”

“Okay, bye-bye, boss!” Zhang Wei interrupted cheerfully. “See you tomorrow!” And with that, the line went dead.

Mr. Thompson sat there, phone in hand, utterly dumbfounded. A mix of disbelief and horror spread across his face as he imagined the chaotic scene awaiting him at home.

That evening, Mr. Thompson returned home to find his wife sitting in the living room, smiling serenely as she sipped tea. There was no sign of Zhang Wei—or any evidence of his alleged visit. Cautiously, he broached the subject.

“Did… did Zhang Wei come here today?” he asked, his voice trembling.

His wife looked up, puzzled. “Zhang Wei? No, why?”

Relieved but still baffled, Mr. Thompson vowed never to give “creative” advice again. Meanwhile, Zhang Wei chuckled to himself at home, reveling in the harmless prank he’d pulled on his unsuspecting boss.

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